Songbook #8: Tiny Changes
Frightened Rabbit, Stutz and Atomic Habits
Happy New Year!
One of my favourite lyrics is from Frightened Rabbit’s Heads Roll Off, where Scott Hutchison sings, “And while I'm alive, I'll make tiny changes to earth”. I always hear it as a call to action: every positive action I am able to take matters.
It matters, as acting with goodness in our hearts causes positive ripples in the cosmic pond. Of course the opposite is true too. Who can’t think of a time when they’ve passed anger, pain or frustration onto an innocent bystander?
I wrote about meeting Scott Hutchison in Johannesburg in Songbook #5. He was a lovely man, full of heart and soul. His music inspired many and his lyrics offered companionship to me and many of my friends through tough times.
Scott tragically took his life in 2019. When I read the news at my desk, a colleague rushed into my office to see if I was okay. I’m not sure what noise I may have made at that moment, but it hit me hard. I’m not sure you have to have lost someone close to you to suicide to find anything related to suicide so triggering, but it’s certainly been the case for me since losing my dad in 2011.
It took me the better part of a decade to invest in seeing a psychologist after I found myself angrier and more frustrated than I was accustomed to feeling. I went for weekly therapy sessions for around a year with a man with kind eyes in Johannesburg and am in a much better place for it.
I referenced the achingly beautiful Red Hand Files in my previous Songbook, the Nick Cave Omnibus. Nick provides written responses to his fans' questions and in Red Hand File #147 he provides a perspective on suffering:
What do we do with suffering? As far as I can see, we have two choices — we either transform our suffering into something else, or we hold on to it, and eventually pass it on … By acting compassionately we reduce the world’s net suffering, and defiantly rehabilitate the world. It is an alchemical act that transforms pain into beauty. This is good. This is beautiful.
As far as compassionate acts that reduce the world’s suffering go, I can’t help but think of the Netflix documentary, Stutz. Directed by Jonah Hill, the film chronicles the life and career of Hill’s therapist, Dr Phil Stutz. Hill says that the purpose of the film is to give the tools he learned in therapy from Dr Stutz to a wide audience in a way that enables people to make their lives better.
He delivers on this promise and more. Wanting to hear more from my man, Stutz, I found myself in unfamiliar waters, listening to Gwyneth Paltrow on the Goop Podcast. She interviewed Phil Stutz and there’s a lovely bit around the 20 minute mark where he talks about the impact that each of us can have on the world.
I call it The World of Small Things. What you do at the small level, the individual level, can move the whole world. Now, not if two people do it, you need a lot of people to do it.
Whether Stutz listens to Frightened Rabbit is a question for another time, but this idea about making tiny positive changes is something I’m fully behind. I’m currently reading James Clear’s Atomic Habits which has the payoff line, “Tiny Changes, Remarkable Results”. So, rather than thinking about my lofty goals for the year ahead, I’m thinking of the daily habits I can build to improve my life and the lives of the people closest to me.
Phil Stutz starts off every patient’s session with the question, “What do you want?”, and to be honest, I was hoping to find a way to enigmatically insert that thought into this conclusion. But I’m going to go poach an egg instead.
If you're interested to read more about Stutz, my friend, , wrote an excellent essay on his Substack here.
Great piece, Nic, as always. I really enjoy reading you. And thank you for the shout out! :)
Love this Nic. Brave and clear writing.